Lying and Denying
by ljbimoore
Summary: An aftermath to 7.10. Can Donna and Harvey ever get past the lying and denying that keep them apart?
1. Chapter 1

Donna stood on the rooftop of Pearson, Specter, Litt and let the cold air blow across her face, cooling it. She pressed a hand to her lips and breathed deeply.

What the hell had she done?

The look on Harvey's face as she'd apologized was imprinted on her brain. It was a look of complete confusion. She closed her eyes trying to block it out, but it was no use.

He was dating Paula. He was going to hate her for pouncing on him when he was in a relationship with someone. She had put him in the awkward and difficult position of deciding whether to tell Paula. If the kiss had been one-sided it might have been easier for him to deal with, but he had returned the kiss, deepened it.

She remembered the precise moment he had gone from shocked to passionate. It was over almost before it began, but he had leaned into the kiss, deepened it by pressing more firmly against her lips. She knew if she had let the kiss go on, she would have soon felt the press of his tongue against her lips.

But she had pulled back, already stunned by her own boldness. She'd apologized, justified, and walked out.

The logical part of her mind was telling her that the kiss was foolhardy, that she'd risked everything because Mike and Louis had made her afraid she was losing Harvey.

Although if she was being truthful, the fear had already been there. It was the same fear that was always there in the back of her mind when Harvey dated someone seriously. She was always sure, this was it; this was going to be the woman Harvey was looking for; the one that was going to command his attention and pull him away from her. When he was single and carousing, she was never thrilled to hear about his exploits, but she could deal with the flings and the casual sex.

It was when he really fell for someone, made plans, got serious, that she started to feel like a weight was sitting on her chest.

Part of her wanted to scream at him that he was a blind fool and part of her, the part that loved Harvey more deeply than she had words for, was happy he was happy. She always told him all she wanted was for him to be happy, which was mostly true. She just couldn't help it if a big part of her was completely sure he would be happiest with her.

Now, alone on the rooftop, she walked slowly to the edge and looked out across the cityscape trying to clear her mind.

Suddenly, the door to the roof flew open and slammed against the wall behind it.

Harvey stood in the doorway, stock still and staring at her. He'd discarded his tie sometime in the last few minutes. His shirt collar was open and she watched his adam's apple moving up and down as he swallowed.

Without warning, he marched angrily toward her. His scowl was deep and he didn't stop until he was less than a foot away from her. She was tempted to step back, but she was backed up against the roof wall.

His voice was unsteady when he spoke, laced with anger.

"What the hell was that?" His dark brown eyes bored into her, making her turn her face away, but he grabbed hold of her chin and forced her to look at him. "Explain yourself."

Donna took exception to being treated like a child being reprimanded and she slapped his hand away from her chin, stepping to the right, trying to get some distance.

"What kind of explanation do you want, Harvey? It was just a momentarty lapse of judgement, okay? It was nothing."

"Nothing?" Harvey sounded pissed off and insulted. "You kissed me for nothing? You jeopardized my relationship with Paula for nothing? What am I supposed to tell her now?" Harvey's voice rose with each question, until he was shouting.

"I don't know, Harvey!" Donna yelled back. "How about you tell her the truth; that we've been lying to ourselves for years, pretending this thing between us isn't real."

Harvey shook his head, denial spreading across his features. It was the same denial that appeared every time the moment got too heated for him, or anytime either of them said something that had the potential to bring them closer. Flashes of memory floated across her memory of all the times Harvey had run away when things got to close for his comfort:

 _..."You know I love you, Donna."... Closed the door, walked away._

 _..."Because I think you're worthy, and I don't want to lose you."... Grabbed his jacket, walked away..._

The same expression covered his face now as he spoke, his voice much quieter. "What are you talking about? What thing?"

Something burst a little in Donna's heart at Harvey's continued denial. She decided she was sick to death of his denial, of his running away when things got serious. She was suddenly determined to show him exactly what thing she was talking about; to force him to stop pretending. Her mind screamed at her to just walk away, but her bruised heart carried on.

Donna closed the space between them so that she was pressed up against him. "This thing, Harvey." Her voice was a seductive purr as she ran her hands up his chest, twisting them into his collar and tugging him closer.

She could feel the rock-hard stillness of his body as a muscle jumped in his cheek. "Donna, you're being ridiculous."

But Donna heard the hoarseness in his voice, saw his pupils expanding.

"Am I Harvey? This doesn't feel ridiculous to me. It…feels... perfect..." With each word she placed a kiss along his collarbone.

His breathing was rapid and she could feel his heart racing against her. She slid three buttons free on his dress shirt and her hand slipped in to caress his chest.

She continued planting kisses, running her tongue lightly across his exposed chest. Her fingers gently squeezed his right nipple. He sucked in a ragged breath and expelled it as a guttural moan as she slipped her hand out of his shirt and down to the front of his pants. She could feel the hard length of him through the material and she squeezed lightly.

"Donna, stop" His voice was barely a whisper and harsh with desire. But she did stop, bringing both her hands to rest on his cheeks.

She leaned up to breathe into his ear, "I'll stop, Harvey if you want me to." She placed another kiss just under the corner of his jaw, sucking and nibbling on the skin there. "Just tell me to go."

She moved so she could stare up at him, not bothering to mask the naked longing in her gaze.

Harvey let out a ragged breath, and his head sank onto her shoulder. His forehead rested there a second before he spoke, his voice filled with raw need. "Please, Donna, don't do this to me."

It was as though she'd been doused with a bucket of ice water. What was she doing?! The alarm bells finally shattered her haze of passion and hurt.

She was trying to force Harvey into cheating on the woman he was with. She was using every trick she had to coerce this faithful man into forgetting his promises and making love to her on a rooftop. After which, he would never be able to forgive himself and would likely hate her for helping to drive him to commit the one sin he'd always detested more than anything in the world.

She pulled away from him abruptly leaving him slightly off balance.

Tears welled up in her eyes and she let them fall unchecked.

"I'm sorry, Harvey. I'm so sorry"

And this time it was her turn to run away.


	2. Chapter 2

Harvey threw his pen down in frustration. He simply couldn't concentrate. He'd never had trouble compartmentalizing and prioritizing work above everything, but he couldn't pull his mind away from last night.

He shut his eyes trying desperately to block the visions he knew were about to swarm his mind. Sure enough, the images of the night before slammed him and his body reacted as it had last night, growing hard at the mere remembrance of Donna.

He had been floored when she had thrown her arms around his neck and kissed him, but amid the confusion in his brain, his body seemed to know exactly what he wanted. Before he knew it, though, Donna was pulling back and apologizing.

He was completely stunned as she walked out of the room. He'd sat down and poured himself a drink, pulling off his tie so he could try and get some more air into his addled brain.

He'd only taken two sips of scotch before getting angry that she'd just walked away. She owed him an explanation.

By asking the few people who remained in the building, he'd determined that she was headed for the roof. A loud voice was telling him to leave her be up there, to just go home, but the voice had been easy to ignore.

Now, turning in his chair to face the bank of windows behind him, he ran a hand across his face. He'd never expected such a reaction from Donna when he went to the rooftop, he never expected his own response. All he'd had to do, at any point, was step back, leave the rooftop. But his body had refused, his muscles literally would not back away from her hands and her mouth. It had taken every ounce of strength he had not to simply pull her to him and…

"Harvey?"

Harvey's whole body stiffened in response to her voice. He stayed staring out the window. "Harvey, can we…can we talk?" Her voice was quiet and hesitant. It was so very un-Donna. For some inexplicable reason this made him angry. He spun around in his chair still not looking at her.

He shifted around some of the paperwork in front of him. "I'm busy right now, Donna."

"I think it's important that we talk about what happened." Her voice was sad; that made him angrier.

"There's nothing to talk about, Donna. Just go away." He issued the order as he stared down at the papers on his desk. With a gun to his head, he couldn't have read a single word on the page in front of him. Every single iota of his attention was focused on the woman across the room.

"Harvey…" she began again, and suddenly it was just too much. He was too exhausted, he was too charged, too much on fire and too aching. He wanted too badly to crush her lips with his own.

"Just get out, Donna," he said quietly and then when she still stood there he yelled, "Get out!" The staff working and walking outside his office stopped for a minute before pretending to go back to their business.

He continued to stare down at his desk long after he'd heard her walk out, long after the light scent of her floral perfume had dissipated. He dropped his head into his hands. What was he supposed to do now?

Donna splashed water on her face again, trying to make it look as though she hadn't spent the last ten minutes crying a bathroom stall.

She knew she was unsuccessful when Rachel walked in and stopped abruptly. "Holy shit, Donna, what happened?"

Donna just shook her head and seeing the concern on her best friend's face, the tears started again. Rachel wrapped her arms around Donna and let her cry for another few minutes.

Finally, as Donna turned to splash more water on her face, Rachel asked again. "Donna, what happened?"

Donna let out a long sigh. "I ruined everything and now he's never going to forgive me."

Rachel squeezed Donna's forearm. "Donna, you've made mistakes on cases in the past, and Harvey has always forgiven you."

Donna's brow wrinkled, "How did you know I was talking about Harvey?"

Rachel shot her a look that said simply, 'please', and sarcasm dripped from her response. "Just a wild guess."

Donna shook her head dismissively. "Well, it doesn't have anything to do with a case."

It was Rachel's turn to be puzzled. "If it doesn't have to do with a case, then why would he have to forgive you?"

Donna remained silent, leaving Rachel more perplexed than ever. "Donna, what happened?" She over-pronounced each word, as though Donna had some kind of language barrier that prevented her from understanding simple questions.

Donna looked down at Rachel where she leaned against the sink. "I kissed Harvey" she said simply.

Rachel's jaw dropped momentarily before her face broke into a huge grin. "It's about friggin' time!" Donna's eyes welled up again and Rachel lost the grin. "Except, your crying, so what went wrong?"

Donna's voice was exasperated. "I told you already what the problem was. I told you Harvey's dating Paula. I kissed him when he's dating someone else."

Rachel gave Donna a sympathetic look. "Did he kiss you back?"

"Yes." Donna's voice was a whisper.

"So, you think that's why he won't forgive you, because he'll feel guilty? But, Donna, just give it time, and maybe try…" she trailed off as Donna continued shaking her head.

"That isn't why he won't forgive me." A guilty expression made Rachel hesitate.

"What did you do?" she asked cautiously.

"He came up to the roof…and…" her voice became defensive. "I ended the kiss and walked away. But then he came up to the roof and he was being…insufferable in that typical Harvey way…trying to claim there was nothing between us." Donna's voice was upset and her arms were gesticulating wildly while she explained…"and I was just so fed up with his ability to pretend that we aren't anything that I…I sort of snapped and…" she abruptly stopped speaking.

"And?" Rachel prompted, eyes wide.

"And I may have tried…to get him to…do more than kiss me."

Rachel stood up straight. "You tried to seduce him?" Her voice was half shocked and half awed.

Donna covered her face with her hands and her voice was muffled. "I was pretty aggressive. I was." She pulled her hand away and spoke clearly. "I wanted him to…well I wanted him, Rachel"

Rachel took a moment to decide whether she should ask the question she was dying to ask. She decided she just had to know.

"And did he…or I mean, did you…" she left the question dangling.

Donna shook her head. "No, he was much stronger than me and he asked me to go. But, it was definitely…something happened." There was a pause while Donna swallowed hard trying to get out the next words. "And now he won't even look at me. He yelled at me to get out of his office. He hates me Rachel. He hates me!" Donna pressed her fingertips into her eyes as tears threatened to fall again.

Rachel wrapped her arm around Donna's shoulder and gave her a tight squeeze. "I think it's physically impossible for Harvey to hate you Donna."

Donna's voice was forlorn. "You didn't see his face Rachel. He was furious and acting as though I wasn't even in the room."

"Still," continued Rachel, "give him time. He'll come around and start talking to you again and you guys can work it out." Rachel paused and squeezed again. "For what it's worth I think you were right. Maybe you shouldn't have used your exact method, but I think Harvey definitely needs to be jolted by something to realize how he really feels about you." She smiled mischievously. "Maybe next time though just get like, a skywriter to form the words, 'Harvey, you are in love with me' in big white letters."

Donna rolled her eyes. "I never said I think he's in love with me."

Rachel gave her a look of pure frustration and shook her head. "Donna, I don't know how you can know so much about everything and be so completely oblivious about this."

Harvey tipped back the contents of his glass, finishing his second scotch before pouring number three.

"Jesus, Harvey, what are you Don Draper? It's barely four o'clock." Louis Litt strolled into the room, dropping a stack of files onto Harvey's table.

"Don't start, Louis." Harvey slouched down into the cushions on his chair, his long legs stretched out in front of him.

Louis held up a conciliatory hand. "I'm not starting anything, Harvey. I'm just dropping off the documents you asked me to go over in the Kingston-Kline merger. Everything looks to be clean."

"Great."

Louis walked over to sit on the couch. "What's wrong, Harvey?"

"Nothing Louis. Thanks for the stuff for Kingston-Kline. You can go." Harvey leaned his head back, closing his eyes.

"Well, that's not happening. You're obviously in distress, and I don't like when my friends are in distress. So, tell me what I can do to help."

Harvey rubbed a hand across his eyes. "I'm not in distress, Louis."

"What kind of distress?" Mike asked as he walked in.

"Perfect." Harvey mumbled and then louder and with a lot of sarcasm, "Please, come join the party."

"Thanks!" said Mike cheerfully as he poured himself a drink. "So, what's stressing Harvey out?" he asked Louis.

"I don't know yet, he won't tell me."

"Oh, for fuck sake!" Harvey snarled sitting up straight and downing the last of drink number three. "Nothing is stressing or distressing me, okay. I'm perfect."

"You look like shit, Harvey." Mike said simply.

Harvey scowled at him, an angry retort building but then Louis spoke softly.

"We're here for you Harvey."

Likely it was the drinks that caused it, but Louis' words actually touched Harvey and he realized that it might make him feel better if he confided in Mike and Louis. God knew they could keep a secret.

Still, Harvey wasn't sure how to talk about it. He decided to just tell them the truth straight up, so he did. He started with what had happened in Donna's office and then on the roof. To their credit they listened intently and didn't interrupt.

He finished talking and silence reigned as he poured drink number four.

"So…" Mike started but trailed off. "What have you…" He shook his head. "Nope, I definitely don't know where to start."

"What did Donna say when you saw her today?" Louis asked.

Harvey shook his head. "I didn't…I didn't see her."

Louis scoffed. "That's bullshit, because there's no way Donna Paulsen doesn't come to talk to you about what happened. There's no way she would have just let it lie like that."

Harvey's guilty expression said it all.

"Jesus." Mike said, rolling his eyes. "What did you say to her, Harvey?"

Harvey stood up and walked toward the windows. "I told her that I didn't want to talk and that she had to get out."

Both Mike and Louis threw up their hands. Before they could speak, Harvey tried to defend himself.

"Look!" He said loudly, "You don't get it. Last night I was seconds away, maybe less, from breaking every vow I've ever made to myself. If she hadn't walked away at the precise moment she had, I would have…" Harvey sank down on the edge of the windowsill. "I was angry with myself and I didn't know what to say to her. I still don't understand why she did what she did."

Louis' voice was slightly mocking. "See, that's something you could have talked to Donna about, if you hadn't told her to get lost."

"I think this was my fault, Harvey." Mike said, cutting into the budding argument. "I told Donna to tell you how she feels about you. I guess that was her way of telling you how she felt."

Harvey frowned at him. "Why would you do that?"

"Because, Harvey," Mike said, frustration in his tone, "you guys are great together. You deserve to be happy with each other!"

Harvey just leaned against the window sill, staring at the ground, shaking his head, so Mike cleared his throat and stood up. "Okay, Harvey, sit down. We're lawyers, we're going to approach this with questions and facts."

Harvey was about to object, but Mike grabbed him by the arm and hustled him back to his seat. "We're doing this." Harvey threw off Mike's hand, but he sat down, an unimpressed look on his face.

"So," Mike began, pacing back and forth as though in front of a jury. "Question number one, Harvey. Do you love Donna?"

Harvey shook his head, shooting Mike a very disgusted look. "That's a ridiculous question."

"Why?" Mike and Louis asked simultaneously.

Harvey looked between them both. "Because if I say I do, you'll read into it."

Mike nodded decisively. "Okay, so you do. We've established that." He looked knowingly at Louis. "Not that we didn't already know it, right?" Louis rolled his eyes again and nodded.

Harvey sucked at his teeth and contemplated punching them both.

"Question number two, does it bother you to see her dating other guys?" Before Harvey could answer, Mike answered his own question. "Yes, it does. Question three…"

"Hey!" Harvey interrupted. "It doesn't bother me to see her dating someone else."

Louis fake coughed into his hand. "Bullshit!"

Mike grinned. "Louis is absolutely right, Harvey. You were completely unimpressed when she was dating Steven Huntley, and I've seen you the few times Donna has mentioned going out on a date. You look like you ate bad clams." Mike threw his hands up. "For God's sake, you beat the shit out Huntley when you found out he hurt her!"

Harvey was incredulous. "Excuse me, I beat the shit out of Steven Huntley because he ordered people to be killed and tried to screw over this firm."

"Um…no." Mike said succinctly. "I was in the room, Harvey, and I remember everything exactly as it happened. You were pissed when you found out what he did, but it wasn't until you turned around and saw Donna crying and the broken look on her face that you made the decision to go and kick his ass; something that you'd wanted to do from the second you found out about him and Donna. Am I wrong?"

Harvey just glowered.

"Okay," Mike continued. "third and final question." He paused and Harvey gestured for him to get on with it. "Do you want to sleep with her?"

Harvey stood up again, his face furious. "I'm not answering that."

Mike nodded. "Well, that's fine because you don't have to, because we already know the answer to that too. Of course you do."

"Yeah, of course I do." Harvey said angrily. "But it's a bullshit question because it's Donna and she's beautiful and sexy as hell, so of course I find her attractive. I'm a heterosexual male, so yes, I'd like to sleep with her. But that doesn't mean…"

Mike cut him off. "I'm a heterosexual male. I don't want to sleep with her. Louis?"

"Nope. Gross. It would be like sleeping with my sister." He pointed at Harvey. "Which you already did, so…"

Harvey rounded on Louis, looking like he was ready to punch him. Instead he threw his hands up. "Well, none of this make any difference because none of it means jack shit. It's just a bunch of feelings twisted into whatever point you're trying to make. But I'm telling you…"

"Harvey!" Mike yelled at him. "Jesus Christ, you're an idiot! These are the facts. You love Donna. You hate thinking of her with another man. And you desperately want her. Those things add up to you getting your fucking head out of your ass and trying to make something happen before you lose her. Because contrary to what you may believe, she isn't going to wait around for you forever."

The room was silent for a solid minute. Harvey finally slumped back into his chair. His elbows rested on his knees and he dropped his head into his hands.

"I'll fuck it up." His voice was a whisper. "I'll do what I always do and fuck it up somehow and then she'll be gone." He looked up at them. "You saw what happened to me when she just left my desk. I lost my shit. If we try to be together and I ruin everything, I'll lose her forever. I wouldn't survive the complete absence of Donna."

He scrubbed a hand across his face. "And what about Paula? I do care about her. She's a good woman. I don't want to hurt her. I'd be leaving something easy and simple with Paula to enter into something terrifying and tough with Donna." He ran his hands through his hair and fell back in the chair. "What if I'm not strong enough to do that?"

Mike tried to think of the right words to comfort and encourage Harvey. Louis spoke first.

"Don't be such a pussy!"

"Louis!" Mike threw Louis a warning look.

"No, Mike, he's being a pussy." Harvey sat up, scowling at Louis, but Louis continued. "You have the chance to be with your soulmate, she's free, and in love with you too. Do you know how pathetic you are if you pussy out just because it's the tougher road?"

Louis left the rhetorical question to hang in the air. It was a while before Harvey stood up. Mike and Louis held their breath.

"Tell Ray to meet me downstairs in five minutes."


	3. Chapter 3

Donna took another sip of wine and laid her head back on her couch. God, what she wouldn't give to be able to go back and redo the last twenty-four hours.

Harvey's face flashed into her mind. It wasn't his face as she'd last seen it, angry and harsh. In her mind Harvey was grinning that sexy, knowing grin that never failed to make her smile in return. It also never failed to cause a little flip in her stomach.

There were times when that smile had fixed a completely broken day.

And now she wouldn't see it again. She'd lost it. Her own greediness in wanting more from Harvey had made it so that she no longer had any piece of Harvey. A tear leaked out of the corner of her eye.

There was a sudden pounding at her door that made her jump, nearly spilling wine all over herself. She put the glass on the coffee table and walked quickly to the door.

She had barely turned the knob when the door was pushed open and Harvey was barging in. She didn't manage to get out a squeak before she found herself pushed up against the wall beside her door with Harvey's mouth slanting over hers. There was no gentleness in the kiss, no subtlety, only blind, hard passion. Her mouth had been open to speak before he'd covered it with his own and he used the opportunity to sweep his tongue into her without waiting for permission.

She allowed her mouth to be ravaged for a few minutes before finally getting up the will to push against Harvey's shoulders. He pulled back ever so slightly, his face a mere inch or two away from her own. It took everything in her power not to immediately pull his mouth back to hers.

"Harvey," she said, her voice a rasp, "what is…this...some..." She cleared her throat and tried again. "Is this some kind of revenge?"

Harvey's eyes went from hot and desperate to shocked and hurt. "What?" He pushed away from her. "How the hell could you ask me that? How could you...is that what you think of me? That I'd kiss you for revenge?"

Donna slammed her door shut and walked into her apartment and away from him. "Well, what am I supposed to think, Harvey? The last time I saw you, you were so pissed at me, you wouldn't even look at me!"

Harvey stalked toward her, forcing her to back up a few paces before she stopped, angry at herself for retreating. Less than a foot separated them when Harvey halted his progress, and scowled down at her. In her stocking feet she was a good three or four inches shorter than she usually was when going toe to toe with Harvey and the difference made her straighten her spine to try and lessen his ability to tower over her.

Harvey's dark chocolate-colored eyes seemed bottomless. She couldn't look away. His voice was quiet and full of heat when he spoke. It was so deep and dark that it sent goosebumps racing over Donna's skin.

"The last time you saw me I wasn't pissed at you, I was pissed at me. And the only reason I wasn't looking at you was because I knew that if I so much as glanced in your fucking direction I was going to rip every stitch of clothing from your body, throw you onto my couch and not let you up until you were screaming my name."

Donna's mouth dropped open and her eyes bulged, her breathing came short and fast. When she realized she was literally panting, she closed her mouth and swallowed, hard.

Harvey stood close enough that she could feel the heat radiating from him. She closed her eyes to block out the sight of his face, with its perfect features, hungry eyes, and delicious mouth. She knew that her lips were swollen from the things that mouth could do.

"Harvey, I'm so sorry. I never should have done what I did last night. It was calculated and cruel. I just...I wanted you to admit that there is something between us because I was starting to think I was crazy." She took a deep breath and looked down at the floor. "But I never should have done that to you when I know you're with Paula. It...it was cruel." She repeated.

Harvey closed the distance between them. He lifted her chin with his finger and she looked into his eyes again and shivered.

"It was cruel." His voice was barely a whisper, as he leaned forward and pressed his lips to her ear before speaking. "What should your punishment be?"

He dropped kisses along her jawline before reaching her mouth. He took her bottom lip between his teeth and bit it, causing Donna to gasp. He pulled the abused lip into his mouth, sucking gently.

The blood rushed out of her brain to pool at the very center of her.

Harvey swooped his tongue into her mouth again and she gave herself up to him for the moment. She knew she needed to pull away; that as the person who had started all of this, she owed it to him to stop him from doing something he would regret. But not yet...not yet.

Finally, as he moved away from her mouth and began nibbling his way down her neck and unbuttoning her blouse, she put her hands on his to stop him. "Harvey, don't."

He stilled immediately.

"This isn't right, you'll never forgive yourself, or me, if we go further than we already have."

Donna didn't dare look up at him. Instead, she studied their joined hands. When he didn't immediately back away, she disentangled her hands from his, and moved away from him, buttoning up her shirt.

Before she could go very far, however, Harvey grabbed hold of her upper arm in a gentle grip. She could have pulled away easily.

 _I will pull away_ , Donna thought, but she stayed still, half turned away from Harvey.

He pulled her back toward him, but she stayed turned so that her back was pressed up against him. It was too easy for him to bend down and nuzzle her neck. She could feel the very slight rasp from his five o'clock shadow as he kissed the spot just below her ear. Her body was wracked with shivers as he slipped his hands from her upper arm to her blouse, where he once again began unbuttoning her.

"Harvey!" She called out as she let her head fall back against his shoulder. She wasn't sure now, whether his name was an entreaty for him to stop or continue.

He did stop though, turning her slowly in his arms so that she faced him. "Do you want me to stop, Donna?" It took everything she had to nod her head jerkily.

"Do you only want me to stop because of Paula?" He tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "Because if Paula is the only reason, you should know that I broke up with her this evening."

Donna knew her face showed her complete shock, but she couldn't regulate her expression. "Why?" She blurted out. "Because you want to sleep with me?"

Harvey's face clouded over and he stepped back from her again, the hurt returning to his voice, making it harsh. "You think I'm just here to get laid?"

Donna responded with some heat of her own. "Well!" She said loudly and little defensively. "You walked in the door and pinned me to a wall. You said you wanted to rip my clothes off..." Donna trailed off, a blush staining her cheeks.

Harvey's expression lost its anger and he looked away, slightly sheepish. "I won't deny that I want you. Obviously I couldn't deny it anymore if I tried."

He closed his eyes and swallowed. "But I want a hell of a lot more than sex. We've tried the whole 'sleep-together-and-move-on' thing." A hint of his usual grin tilted up the corners of his mouth. "I don't know about you, but I've had a pretty tough time with the whole moving on part."

He looked back at her and his voice became quiet and heated. "I think about that night a lot more often than I should."

His gaze held her spellbound while visions from that night replayed in her head. She knew he was remembering too and the knowledge made her heart race. He cleared his throat and stepped back. "So yes, I want you, Donna, but I want more than a night, I want everyday too. And I want more than your body, I want your heart too." Her mind was racing, and she could feel tears prickling at the back of her eyes.

He took another step back from her and began pacing, his pent-up energy needing an outlet. "You asked me once how I loved you and I was too chicken shit scared to tell you then, but I'll tell you now." He took a deep breath.

"I love how grumpy you are on Monday mornings; and I love how I can almost always cajole you out it. I love how passionate you are when you talk about the stage and Shakespeare. I love how smart you are and how clever. I love how much you care about your friends. I love how incredibly strong you are. I love how much shit you give me when you know I could be better. I love how my day never fails to brighten when you smile at me."

Tears were streaming down Donna's face as Harvey continued.

"I love how silly you can be and how you encourage me to be an idiot too. I love how much faith you have in me and how strong and powerful you make me feel, like I could take on the world."

He stopped pacing and looked at her. At the sight of her tears he stepped close and cupping her cheeks, wiped them away with his thumbs.

"I love how vulnerable you are and how much you've taught me about love, caring, and kindness."

He dropped one hand to her lower back and threaded the other through her hair, cupping the back of her head. "This is how I love you, Donna; altogether and completely."

He pulled her into his embrace and kissed her temple. He laid his cheek against the top of her head.

"If you'll take a chance on me, I promise I'll always do my best to make you love me the same way. I know I'm going to screw up, I know I'll make mistakes, but if you'll grant me a little latitude and tell me when I'm being an asshole, I think we can do this. I really want to try. What do you think?"

Donna pushed out of his arms and Harvey's face fell for a moment before she stuck out her hand.

"Deal." She said grinning cheekily through her tears.

Harvey smiled his sexy, cocky smile, the smile she'd been afraid she would never see again. He took her hand and shook before pulling her back into the circle of his arms.

His lips covered hers, gently this time, soft and light. Donna tried to pull him closer, get him to kiss her deeper, but he wouldn't be rushed. He pressed his lips to hers and then pulled away to brush his lips and fingers like a butterfly across her cheeks and forehead.

He returned to her mouth and pressed a fraction more firmly, stayed there a moment longer before moving to dip his head to the pulse point in her neck, where he grazed his teeth gently across her skin causing her to moan softly. The sound brought him back to her lips where he finally gave in to her gentle insistence and kissed her deeply, his tongue sweeping in to stroke hers.

Donna was sure her heart was going to beat out of her chest. She was desperate to get her hands on him, all of him. She pulled away, her breathing ragged and deep. "The bed…" she pointed weakly down the hall as Harvey's hand ran down her back and over her backside, cupping it and pulling her close enough to feel his heat and hardness. "The bed is…it's in the bedroom." She said stupidly, her brain nothing but sensation and fire.

Harvey lifted her, and she wrapped her legs around his waist instinctively, linking her arms around his neck. He continued kissing anywhere his lips could reach as he walked down the hallway to the bedroom.

He walked them into the side of the bed where he dropped her. She let out a happy squeal as he came down on top of her. He pushed her hair back as he rained kisses down her neck and across her collarbone. He struggled with the buttons on her blouse this time, and ended up popping off a couple of them in his haste.

"Hey!" She said, laughing up at him. "You're going have to replace this blouse you know! It's Dior!"

He grinned at her. "Take it out of petty cash."

Amidst their laughter, Donna pulled off Harvey's shirt and tie, popping a few buttons of her own. "Now we're even!"

The rest of their clothes were ripped off with very little care. When they finally lay together skin to skin the laughter faded into sighs and gentle moans as their hands and mouths explored each other.

Harvey's hands were magic, his fingers knowing just where to press, just how to stroke her, bringing her to the brink of pleasure before pulling away and focusing elsewhere only to return and build up the pressure again and again until she was writhing and calling out his name.

He moved above her and took her face in his hands. "Donna." She opened her eyes and looked up at him through a haze of passion. "I love you. For so many years I've dreamed of you like this, beautiful and breathless beneath me. Tell me you love me too, promise me we'll make this work." His eyes were filled with passion and heat, but they were also intense in their clarity, like he could see into her soul.

She placed her hands on his where they rested on her cheeks and her eyes welled up when she answered. "I promise, Harvey. I love you with my everything. We will work."

With those words, he joined their bodies and they moved together, giving and receiving passion, and love.

In the aftermath, Donna lay snuggled into Harvey's chest, his arm thrown over her side. He ran his hand up and down her back and Donna couldn't remember ever feeling so complete and happy.

"Donna?"

"Hmmm?" She mumbled sleepily.

"This was better than the other time, right?"

She looked up at him incredulously. "Um…yes, Harvey." She said, speaking slowly as though trying to explain a difficult concept to a very dim person. "This time, with our thirteen years of friendship and simmering passion and our declarations of love and promises of commitment," she paused as though letting that sink in, "was definitely better than the other time." She shook her head at him, smiling.

He chuckled. "Just checking."

She rolled her eyes at him before snuggling back into his side, laying her head on his shoulder.

"Donna?"

"Yes, Harvey?" she said, indulgently

"Do you think we could try the whipped cream again, though?"

Donna's laughter rang out, as Harvey growled playfully and rolled her over to place kisses and tickles across her stomach.

She was breathless as she answered. "It's in the fridge!"


End file.
